Adopt a Family

Every year my playgroup does 2 or three charity events or fundraisers. The most recent was the one for Animal Aid. Usually this time of year we do a food drive or collect items for Faith House......

This year we have decided to adopt 3 families in our community!

I will say at first I was very put off. The first Charity we got families from was Faith House. And while the people who are in a situation to use Faith House's resources are very in need......you would never know it by the wish lists! First, it is all anonymous, which is understandable, don't get me wrong! I understand the need of privacy and protection of these individuals. But my thinking is that the anonymity gives these individuals an excuse to request very extravagant NON necessities!! For instance GPS Navigators, digital cameras, Wii Games, Sheer Bed Canopies and gift certificates to Victoria Secrets and Bed Bath & Beyond.........

Now you must understand my sheer shock when reading these wants! I mean, we are trying to help people in our community that need a hand up......not buy them things they do not NEED! Our intention is to help ease the burden on these families who barely make it throughout the year, and coupled with cold weather and Christmas they struggle that much more!

Needless to say, these people will not get a thing from me! Their selfish requests and attempts to "get everything they can while it's free" do not make me feel charitable towards them and their families!!

Then there is one of the families we were sent from Catholic Services, they are the epitome of what we were looking for in a family! Single mom, with three growing boys! When I received their wish list I was so happy it wasn't filled with crazy expensive items! She listed one toy for each of her children and clothing sizes! She said that anything we could give would be of great help, but that they really needed clothes!

This family really touched my heart and I am determined, with the help of my friends give this family the best Christmas ever!!

My encounter with this mom was really great! She was holding back tears as I asked her what they needed. I found that they usually don't have a tree and when she can she gets the boys each a single toy from the Dollar Store!

We have been financially in all different places in different stages in our life. And especially after moving here from Oregon, pregnant and starting over.....the first time I wasn't sure how we'd buy the next can of formula......I can relate with the emotion of not being able to provide for your child! It is a horrible feeling!

I hope that we can turn this year into a memorable one for this family. That she will not have to worry about how she will get her boys coats for the winter or clothing for the year!

I am not certain how Catholic Family Services finds their families.......but I am glad we got a deserving family. One that appreciates the help and will allow other to help ease their burden this time of year!

Our first surprise for them will be a huge tree with decorations.........I think she will be pleased!

Number Two

When Regan was about 1, everyone - including people I didn't even know would ask "so when are you having your next one?". This got old very quickly! lol

I honestly wasn't even ready to "entertain" the thought of having another child until a little after Regan turned 4. Soon after she turned 5 I decided that I was close to deciding on a time to try for #2. Regan is now almost 5 1/2 and I am still a little undecided! This is partially because I would be going through a lot of the pregnancy issues and such alone with a 5 year old. It's scary to think of having another when your husband is only home part of the month. Additionally, there is no guarantee that having a 2nd child is in the cards for us, so I am a little worried that I will decide yes and it will never come to light!! I think deciding yes and then having to fail is far worse than never saying yes.......not sure if that makes sense!

Anyways, ever since Regan started school, I don't know what the deal is but everyone I encounter says to Regan, " ooh, time for momma to make you a baby brother of sister!". I mean, even people I don't know! Like the lady at the Chinese restaurant we frequent. And I mean EVERY time we go she says it!

C'mon, no pressure there! Let's tell the 5 year old that she needs to tell her momma and daddy to get started on the baby brother or sister! lol It really is funny when you think about it, but it's been about 3 months now and I want everyone to get off my back! Hehee!

While I sometimes feel that I am waiting to long, I also have not been ready! And when I start to feel badly I remind myself of how nice things are right now. And how privileged Regan is! I mean, she has my undivided attention! I go to her school every Monday for about 4 hours and help her teacher. I attend all of her field trips and school parties and activities. I also am able to take her to dance and tumbling and whatever other activity she wants to be in. In addition to being her Troop Leader and room mom and the playgroup's organizer!

So for now, even though the pressures of other people get in my head, I am reminding myself daily that the things that I am able to do for and with Regan would not be possible right now if there was a little one here! So maybe for the moment this is what is right for us. For our family. And what Regan needs!! She will have the rest of her life to share us with a brother or sister! This year and this time in her life is hers........And this makes me happy! :o)

Little People Doing Big Things!

I just had to gush a little!!

As many of you know I am the Girl Scout Troop Leader for Regan's troop. This was not intentional, even given the "organizing" role I play in many of the other aspects in my life. I really swore I wouldn't, but when they said there would be no troop without a leader I said, what the hell.....I can handle one more hat! lol

Anyways, I am finding the bonus to being the Troop Leader is that I am able to 1, set the schedule to suit our hectic life! Thankfully this has happened to also work for all the other parents - so it's definitely and win/win all around! Secondly, I am able to continue my whole charity/fundraising passion within the troop. Thus, fulfilling the purpose of Girl Scouts and helping our community!! :o) I LOVE it!!

So, for our first fun patch I decided the girls could do a canned food drive! We read a book to them about a Food Drive, then explained what they needed to do! I asked each parent to have their child request canned goods from family or friends or walk up and down and ask neighbors.

Well, I of course had no idea how this would turn out - but was happily surprised at the amount donated!

Our 10 little ladies donated a total of 210 pounds of food! It really is a lot!! I was so happy and proud of my girls!!

Regan did really well, as seen by the pictures below.





Here are my girls, well 4 of them couldn't attend the donation, but sent their goods!

Their food is in the basket behind them!!

This picture is them holding their earned patch!!

And after, we took a trip to Kart Ranch to celebrate, have some fun and eat some pizza!!!



I am so very proud of my girls!!

Next month we will be packaging up care packages for the 4 soldiers we adopted!!! Stay tuned!!

Forgiving!!

I have been doing some soul searching the last few weeks. Mostly because I have been holding in some pent up anger and hurt. I kept saying it wasn't there, but it was and it surfaced last week!

Why is it that when someone hurts you, which is basically a moment of their time to thoughtlessly cast out hateful things, does it stay with the one who receives it the longest??

But I have come to a point of clarity. I am now getting a better understanding of this and am going to move past it!

So the first of these two situations was between myself and a friend. Someone I actually considered to be my closest friend for a few years! Hell, my daughter called her daughter her sister. We were all very close. Well, as a mom and a grown ass adult, I made a call on her judgment (as a parent). It was such a bad and uncomfortable situation that I started to withdraw from our friendship until I could figure out how to approach such a moral dilemma. When it all finally came out - I felt better and felt like we could move forward, but this "friend" decided that my opinion of her bad moral judgment wasn't okay. She started to attack my family and more specifically my daughter and started airing things told to her in private about my childhood.

This hurt deeply. And unfortunately, after this there was no going back! Sad thing is, that instead of us just parting as friends, she had to say things to hurt me. So I grew to hate her for the pain she caused! And I will admit, I wished bad things upon her! I mean, in my head, people who do bad things and wrong others do not deserve anything! They deserve to feel the anguish they cause to others! Will this happen? I don't know. I am sure that while I was dealing with the hurt of the things she said, she was probably dealing with guilt and isolation.

The second situation was with a cousin of mine. Again, this situation was caused by me making a judgment on his character! After being the only supportive person in his life while he had no job, thought he had cancer and had no money, he decides to bring up something from my childhood. De Ja Vue, huh?? I guess everyone who wants to hurt someone must read the same book on how to be a crappy person! lol

Anyways, this unfortunately has to do with money. Money that my husband works hard for and that I loaned to this cousin so that he wouldn't lose his apartment. And so that he could have stitches removed and pay his Dr. And so that he could get a new battery for his car and get gas so he could get the job he was trying to get.

Well, shit on me because I somehow didn't "deserve" the money that I was owed because I wasn't supporting him wanting to buy a house!! Ummm, he didn't have a job! I wasn't being unsupportive, I was being realistic!! Anyways, long story short he never paid my back and then started slandering me, calling me names and stalking me on my phone! It took a trip to the police station to get him to leave me alone!

It is really hurtful when you are there for someone and they not only treat you like crap, but they want to use words to hurt you.

Well, on this day I am moving forward!! This hate that is filling my heart is doing me absolutely no good. I have been told numerous times that I need to forgive. And this, for me, is extremely difficult. For the way I see it, forgiving them will not teach them that what they did was wrong. It will probably show them that they possibly had merit in acting so shitty.

Well, this is my blog and my life for that matter so I will do some forgiving.....but MY way!!

So here it is.

Miranda, I think that it sucks that the 3 years of our friendship and all the good memories we had have to be tarnished with the horrible things you said. But, you are an adult and you made the decisions to do and say what you did. Hopefully you can live with it!

But I forgive you for what you said. I will never forget it and you will always be "that type of person" in my mind. I hope you took something from this and learned how not to treat people!

Billy, it is unfortunate that at your age you cannot see the error in your ways! Asking for money and saying you will pay it back and then finding reasons that I don't "deserve" my money back is just ridiculous! And saying things to me you had no business saying really speaks volumes about the type of person you are. But thank you, because knowing now the type of person you are will save me from lots of drama and pain down the line! Not having you in my life is almost....well, a GIFT so thank you for that!

But, I forgive you! For being so cold and insensetive and really just plan hateful. Hopefully you learned a lesson from it and that will be the good that comes out of this!

So, I will no longer let these feelings plague me. The two of you will one day grow up and realize there are ethics and a moral code that productive people in society live by. How you behave and treat people speaks volumes! Your character is what defines you! I cannot help but pity the both of you because you really do not have enough respect to see what you put onto others. I am certain though that something or someone will hurt you the same and teach you this valuable lesson!

Something to think about..............Our character is but the stamp on our souls of the free choices of good and evil we have made through life. -John C. Geikie

Self Discovery?!

Regan: "momma, who do I look like?"
Me: (in my most serious tone) "you look like Samara!" (our dog)
Regan: Scoffing " No really, who do I look like?"
Me: "I don't know what you mean, honey!"
Regan: "well, I was looking in the mirror today. and I look like .............. Michael Jackson...."
Me: More confused than ever, jaw slightly on the floor.......
Regan: "......and I think I like it......"
Me: ........................................"bwaaaahaaahaaaaa!"

Lessons

So today I found that it is indeed possible to go shopping one day and nothing fit you. And yet the next day, everything you try on will fit....SO weird!

I also learned that "deli" sushi from Albertson's should not even be labeled as sushi. I would rather wait a month for good sushi that waste time or money on that crap-o-la! Blech!

I have learned that even though people know someone is a bad person, not everyone can walk away or take a stand against them. I guess having pity friends is better than having no friends, right?! lol

I have found that lots and lots of shopping for clothes amount to lots and lots of laundry!! What a double edged sword! :o)

I have come to realize that a true judge of ones self is looking at their children.......it definitely tells you a lot! For instance, my kooky little social butterfly definitely didn't fall far from the tree! I love her! <3

I have learned that teachers are angels on earth for sure! I spend 4 hours one day a week "assisting" Regan's teacher and leave there feeling like I've worked a 12 hour shift! God Bless you teachers, for putting up with all our or little pains in the butt for more hours than we have them a day!!!

I continue to see how blessed I am. Every breath I take, every chance I get, every moment I am gifted with and all the love and family I am surrounded by - I am truly blessed!!!